MAKALAH : PAPER ABOUT MARRIAGE
CHAPTER
I
INTRODUCTION
A.
Issue
Background
Islam,
unlike other religions is a strong advocate of marriage. There is no place for
celibacy like, for example the Roman Catholic priests and nuns. The prophet
(pbuh) has said "there is no celibacy in Islam. Marriage is a religious
duty and is consequently a moral safeguard as well as a social necessity. Islam
does not equal celibacy with high "taqwa" / "Iman". The
prophet has also said, "Marriage is my tradition who so ever keeps away
there from is not from amongst me".
Marriage
acts as an outlet for sexual needs and regulate it so one does not become a
slave to his/ her desires. It is a social necessity because through marriage,
families are established and the family is the fundamental unit of our society.
Furthermore, marriage is the only legitimate or halal way to indulge in intimacy between a man and a woman. Islam
takes a middle of the road position to sexual relations, it neither condemns it
like certain religions, nor does it allow it freely. Islam urges us to control
and regulate our desires, whatever they may be so that we remain dignified and
not become like animals.
B.
Purpose
of the paper
1. To
find out how Islam organizes Marriages
2. To
inform how to prepare Marriage
3. To
know how the condition of Marriage
C.
Problem
Formulation
1. How
is the history of marriage in ancient times ?
2. What
should be prepared to marriage ?
3. How
is the rule of marriage in Islam ?
A.
Marriage
in Islamic view
a.
History
of marriage section
In
Arabia before the advent of Islam in the 7th century CE, a variety of different
marriage practices existed. The most common and recognized types of marriage at
this time consisted of: marriage by agreement, marriage by capture, marriage by
mahr, marriage by inheritance and "Mot'a"[1] or temporary marriage. In
Mesopotamia, marriages were generally monogamous, except among royalty, who
would have harems consisting of wives and concubines. The Sasanian society
followed Zoroastrianism, which viewed women to be possessions in marriage,
although consent was required in both marriage and divorce.
According
to Islamic sources, most women in pre-7th century Arabia had little control
over their marriages. They were rarely bound by contract for marriage or
custody of children and their consent was rarely sought. Women were seldom
allowed to divorce their husbands and their view was not regarded for either a
marriage or divorce. However, in the transitional age from non-Islamic to
Islamic society, elite women could divorce and remarry without stigma. They
were given the power to negotiate the terms of their marriage contract, and
could even initiate divorce.
Muhammad
had reformed the laws and procedures of the common marriage practices that
existed during his prophethood. The rules of "marriage by agreement
(marriage through consent)" was reformed and a strict set of rules and
regulations were put in place. The practices of "marriage by
inheritance" was forbidden. Several chapters and verses from the Quran
were revealed which banned such practices. Under the Arabian Jahiliyyah law,
Islamic sources allege that no limitations were set on men's rights to marry or
to obtain a divorce.
Islamic
law limited to men to four wives at one time, not including concubines (Quran
4:3). The institution of marriage was refined into one in which the woman was
somewhat of an interested partner. 'For example, the dowry, previously regarded
as a bride-price paid to the father, became a nuptial gift retained by the wife
as part of her personal property'. Under Islamic law, marriage was no longer
viewed as a "status" but rather as a "contract". The
essential elements of the marriage contract were now an offer by the man, an
acceptance by the woman, and the performance of such conditions as the payment
of dowry. The woman's consent, given either actively or by silence, was required.
Furthermore, the offer and acceptance had to be made in the presence of at
least two witnesses. A married woman had the right to be given food and clothes
by her husband, though her husband had more rights over her: "I enjoin
good treatment of women, for they are prisoners with you, and you have no right
to treat them otherwise, unless they commit clear indecency. If they do that,
then forsake them in their beds and hit them, but without causing injury or
leaving a mark. If they obey you, then do not seek means of annoyance against
them. You have rights over your women and your women have rights over you. Your
rights over your women are that they are not to allow anyone whom you dislike
to tread on your bedding (furniture), nor allow anyone whom you dislike to enter
your houses. And their right over you are that you should treat them kindly
with regard to their clothing and food."[2]
B.
Various
wedding prepartions
When
you have a question that what’s a longest worship in a servant's life? Then the
answer is household, because the longest worship is to get married, you will
really need a struggle, patience, sincerity continuously in the togetherness
that exists. In marriage a person is required to always be patient, to
understanding, to trust, to acceptance, to need each other, to direct each
other, to remind each other and to love each other. So, look a partner who’s
ready to always learn and improve.
Before toward on that
phase, we must learn how to prepare ourselves to be ready to undergo this
glorious worship.
1.
Intention
Married must be with
sincere intentions. It’s better without dating which is usually called taaruf processing or married after
dating (relationship), everything must be based on sincere intentions lillahi ta’ala to do a worship and tread
the future with a legitimate (halal) partner.
2.
Understand the inside and out of Islamic
marriage
Looking for information
about marriage in accordance with religious teaching is highly recommended, so
that when the time comes we already have provisions that can be used to enter
the world of marriage. We will know how is form of sakinah mawaddah warahmah
family and how we can achieve it.
3.
Ijab
kabul and Mahr
(dowry)
If you already have a
view of how to get married in accordance with Islamic law, of course we will
also have a shadow about the process of ijab
kabul and what the meaning of ijab
kabul in the process of Islamic marriage. We can also determine the amount
of Mahr that the male family will
give to his bride. Mahr section can
be a source of conflict between the two families and even a frequent cause of
divorce between husband and wife. Therefore, determine a Mahr wisely.
4.
Trying to improve own moral (akhlak).
Be the ideal husband and
wife is how to have a good morals. Point to maintain a harmony of the household
is how to increase knowledge about religion for us and our partner. This is
important for each of them to improve their morals, so when they become husband
and wife, the household atmosphere will always be harmonious and peaceful.
5.
Start practicing the sunnah
Accustomed to practice
the sunnah is very useful when being
get married. We will be able to give model of good worship to couples, and
children who will be born. Applying religious education in the family will make
our families grow with religious values.
6.
Physical preparation
Health check is one of
the urgent thing of marriage preparation that should be done by bride and
groom. This physical examination is useful as a way to keep your body fit
before marriage.
7.
Prepare material
It is very important for
men to prepare materials or financial planning because of that he can enliven
his family. Abandoning a wife will be the one of seditious towards a wife by
husband.
8.
Avoiding a sins in marriage preparation
To make a marriage that
is in accordance with religion, we cannot follow the general procedures become
in the midst of society or that is becoming the latest trend such as making
intimate pre-wedding photos. Intimate photos will causing a sin because in
Islam is not permitted too close between men and women, even more make a
physical contact before becoming a muhrim.
The physical touch is a danger courtship. Taking pictures is available, but
have to according Islamic scope
9.
Adjust walimah
with Islamic rules
If you want to use
certain customs, try to minimize the procession of customs that is contrary
with Islamic teachings. It’s need a communication with all participant
involved, and also try to discuss about splitting a male and female visitors to
not being mixed.
10. Starting a
pre-marital counseling
One of the requirements
for marriage from the Office of Religious Affairs is undergoing pre-marital
counseling sessions. In that session, we will get a lot of knowledge about
Islamic married life such as how to serve a husband, how to treats well to
wife, and many other religious knowledge about households.
11. Make sure the
marriage is approved by the family
In Islamic teachings, the
blessing of parents is important to start a marriage. Therefore, make sure if
this marriage really has the blessing of parents and they are willing to leave
their child to life with other people.
C.
Marriage
term and procedures
A nikah is valid from
Islamic point of view under the following conditions:
1.
Supervision and testimony : See the
explanation below
2.
Consensual agreement to marry: No girl/boy or woman/man can be wed against
her/his will.
3.
Announcement (walimatul ‘ursy): Marriages, especially the ceremony of nikah is
performed in order to announce the marriage. Therefore, nikah must be announced
to everybody.
4.
Mehr
: Legal Share of Bride is given to the bride by the groom. It is not a
condition for the nikah to be valid, but the right of mehr arises as a natural result of the nikah for the bride.
CHAPTER
III
FINAL
A.
Conclusion
In
Islam, marriage is a social and legal relationship intended to strengthen and extend
family relationships. Islamic marriage begins with a search for an appropriate
partner and is solemnized with an agreement of marriage, the contract, and the
wedding party. Islam is a strong advocate of marriage, and the act of marriage
is considered a religious duty through which the social unit—the family—is
established. Islamic marriage is the only permissible way for men and women to
engage in intimacy.
B. Advice
We
hopefully that all off knowledge about marriage can making us more carefully to
decide getting a marriage. Some of reference can be able to be guidance, we
wish this paper have increase our perception.
REFERENCES
“Ibadah yang paling lama adalah menikah maka
carilah pasangan yang siap untuk selalu belajar dan berbenah”. Humairo.com. 26
November 2019. <https://humairoh.com/ibadah-yang-paling-lama-adalah-menikah-maka-carilah-pasangan-yang-siap-untuk-selalu-belajar-dan-berbenah/>
“What are the condition
of marriage”. Islamandquran.org. 26 November 2019. <http://www.islamandquran.org/fatwas/what-are-the-conditions-of-marriage.html>
Jamaluddin.
(2018). AL Ghazali’s View Regarding to the Witness in Islamic Wedding Ceremony.
Journal of Marriage, 1, 1-10.
“What does Islam say
about Marriage ?”. Learnreligion.com. 27 November 2019. <Ishttps://www.learnreligions.com/islamic-marriage-2004443>
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